The Truth
About Guys
Ø Many people think of guys as being carefree when it comes to
their appearance. But the reality is that a lot of guys spend plenty of time in
front of the mirror. It's a fact — some guys care just as much as girls do
about their appearance.
Ø You may hear a lot about being a tough guy, but how often do you
hear that being a guy is tough? Guys might think that they shouldn't worry
about how they look, but body image can be a real problem for them. Unlike
girls, guys are less likely to talk to friends and relatives about their bodies
and how they're developing. Without support from friends and family, they may
develop a negative self-image. The good news is that self-image and body image
can be changed.
Why Is Body
Image Important?
ü Body image is a person's opinions, thoughts, and feelings about
his or her own body and physical appearance. Having a positive body image means
feeling pretty satisfied with the way you look, appreciating your body for its
capabilities and accepting its imperfections.
ü Body image is part of someone's total self-image. So how a guy
feels about his body can affect how he feels about himself. If he gets too
focused on not liking the way he looks, a guy's self-esteem can take a hit and
his confidence can slide. (The same thing can happen to girls, too.)
How Puberty
Affects Body Image
Although
body image is just one part of our self-image, during the teen years, and
especially during puberty, it can be easy for a guy's whole self-image to be
based on how his body looks. That's because our bodies are changing so much
during this time that they can become the main focus of our attention.
v A change in your body can be tough to deal with emotionally —
mainly because, well, your body is yours and you have become used to it.
v Some guys don't feel comfortable in their changing bodies and
can feel as if they don't know who they are anymore. Being the only guy whose
voice is changing or who's growing body hair (or the only guy who isn't) can
also make some guys feel self-conscious for a while.
v Some guys go into puberty not feeling too satisfied with their
body or appearance to begin with. They may have wrestled with body image even
before puberty started (for example, battles with weight or dissatisfaction
with height). For them, puberty may add to their insecurities.
v It Could Be in Your Genes
v It can be tough to balance what you expect to happen to your
body with what actually does happen. Lots of guys can have high expectations
for puberty, thinking they'll develop quickly or in a certain way.
v The best way to approach your own growth and development is to
not assume you'll be a certain way. Look at everyone in your family — uncles,
grandfathers, and even female relatives — to get an idea of the kinds of
options your genes may have in store for you.
v When Everyone Else Seems Bigger
v Not everyone's body changes at the same time or even at the same
pace. It can be tough if all of your friends have already matured physically
and are taller and more muscular. Most guys eventually catch up in terms of growth,
although some will always be taller or more muscular than others — it's in
their genes.
v It's natural to observe friends and classmates and notice the
different ways they're growing and developing. Guys often compare themselves
with other guys in certain settings, and one of the most common is the locker
room. Whether at a local gym or getting ready for a game at school, time in the
locker room can be daunting for any guy.
v Try to keep in mind in these situations that you aren't alone if
you feel you don't "measure up." Many guys feel exactly the same way
about their own bodies — even those whose physiques you envy. Just knowing that
almost everyone else will go through the same thing can make all the
difference.
v You could try talking to a trusted male adult — maybe a coach, a
doctor, a teacher, or your dad. Chances are they went through similar
experiences and had some of the same feelings and apprehensions when their
bodies were changing.
Picture
Perfect?
Guys put
enough pressure on themselves, but what about the pressure society puts on them
to be perfect?
¨
It used to be that only girls
felt the pressure of picture-perfect images, but these days the media emphasis
on men's looks creates a sense of pressure for guys, too. And sometimes
(actually many times) that "as advertised" body is just not
attainable. The men you see in those pictures may not even be real. Magazines
and ad agencies often alter photographs of models, either by airbrushing the
facial and muscular features, or by putting a good-looking face on someone
else's buff body.
Building a
Better Body Image
So in the
face of all the pressure society places on guys — and guys place on themselves
— what can you do to fuel a positive body image?
Here are
some ideas:
Ø Recognize your strengths. Different physical attributes and body
types are good for different things — and sometimes the things you did well as
a kid can change during puberty. What does your body do well? Maybe your speed,
flexibility, strength, or coordination leads you to excel at a certain sport.
Or perhaps you have non-sports skills, like drawing, painting, singing, playing
a musical instrument, writing, or acting. Just exploring talents that you feel
good about can help your self-esteem and how you think of yourself.
Ø A good body doesn't always translate into athletic success. Too
often, the way guys see their body image is closely associated with their
performance on a sports field or in the gym. The upside to this is that if
you're good at a team sport, you might have a pretty good view of your body.
But what if you don't like team sports or you got cut from a team you really
wanted to make? In these cases, it helps to look at individual accomplishments.
If you don't
like team sports, that's OK. Find another form of physical activity that gets
you going. Depending on your interests and where you live, that may be mountain
biking, rock climbing, yoga, dancing, or jogging. This will help you stay in
shape and help you to appreciate skills you may not have realized you had in a
team environment.
If you like
team sports but didn't make a particular team, don't let it get you down.
Use this as
an opportunity to discover what you're good at, not to lament what you aren't
best at. Maybe try out for another team — so soccer wasn't for you, but maybe
cross-country running will be. Or, continue to practice the sport you were cut
from and try again next year.
The people around you probably won't remember
that you didn't make the team — not being picked is a much bigger deal to you
than it was to them.
v Look into starting a strength training program. Exercise can help you look good and feel good about yourself.
Good physiques don't just happen — they take hard work, regular workouts, and a
healthy diet. There's no need to work out obsessively. A healthy routine can be
as simple as exercising 20 minutes to 1 hour three days a week. Another benefit
to working out properly is that it can boost your mood — lifting weights can
lift your spirits.
v Don't trash your body, respect it!
To help improve your view of your body, take care of it. Smoking and other
things you know to be harmful will take a toll after a while. Treating yourself
well over time results in a healthier, stronger body — and that contributes to
a better body image. Practicing good grooming habits — regular showering;
taking care of your teeth, hair, and skin; wearing clean clothes, etc. — also
can help you build a positive body image.
v Be yourself. Your body is just one
part of who you are — along with your talent for comedy, a quick wit, or all
the other things that make you unique. Your talents, skills, and beliefs are
just as much a part of you as the casing they come in. So try not to let minor
imperfections take over.
While it's
important to have a positive body image, getting too focused on body image and
appearance can cause a guy to overlook the other positive parts of himself. If
you're like most guys who take care of their bodies and wear clothes that look
good, you probably look great to others. You just might not be aware of that if
you're too busy being self-critical.
==--==
