Does Sex Hurt the First Time?
¬ The first time a woman has sex, it may or may not be painful. There
may be psychological and physical reasons for it. If you are not sure about
your partner or if you are not entirely convinced about the timing and place,
then you may feel more pain than you should. If you and your partner truly care
for one another and he is gentle and understanding and will go slowly, then
there may be less discomfort. Physically, often, the first time a woman has sex
there will be some bleeding as the hymen is torn. Using large amounts of a
water-based lubricant may help. If you have been using tampons, that may have
helped to stretch your hymen.
What is the G-Spot?
¬ There is a lot of talk regarding the most erotic zones for a
woman. The Grafenberg spot, or G-spot, is considered to be one such area. This
is an area located within the front wall of the vagina, about one centimetre
from the surface and one-third to one-half way in from the vaginal opening.
¬ The significance of the G-spot is that in about half the women
it is a highly sensitive area that under the right conditions can be very
pleasurable if stimulated. For some women, it can be a primary source of
stimulation leading to orgasm during intercourse.
¬ It is believed that stimulation of the G-Spot can lead to what is
known as female ejaculation.
Is it O.K. to have Sex during a Period?
¬ Sex during periods is a strong taboo in many cultures but there
is no scientific basis for it .For the average, mutually monogamous couple with
no sexually transmitted disease, there is no medical reason to avoid sex during
menses. In fact many women feel increased sexual arousal during the periods.
I feel pain during sex. What could be the
reason?
¬ There may be a host of reasons for painful intercourse. Pain on
initial Penetration is often due to infection, spasm of the vaginal muscles or
inadequate lubrication. Pain on deeper thrusting may be caused by
endometriosis, adhesions (scar tissue), a retroverted (backward-tilting) uterus
or fibroids. Pain in only one particular position may simply mean that in that
position, your partner is pushing against your cervix.
¬ Persistent pain in all the positions should prompt a visit to
your gynaecologist for a thorough checkup.
Bleeding after Intercourse
¬ Bleeding after intercourse (post-coital bleeding in doctor talk)
can occur for several reasons. Infection is one of the most common reasons.
¬ Abnormal cervical cells, including cancer, are also more easily
irritated and may bleed with intercourse. Women who use an IUD or diaphragm may
experience such bleeding from irritation and friction. Sometimes the bleeding
is not from the cervix, but rather from a tear in the vagina; tears can happen
with vigorous sex or if you are dry.
Q: Why does it hurt when I have
intercourse?
A:
Painful intercourse can have a wide range of physical or psychological causes,
from bacterial infection to anxiety to hormonal changes due to menopause. If
sex hurts, see your gynecologist and discuss the pain in as much detail as you
can. Jot down basics such as:
•
When the pain began
•
Where you feel it (at the opening of your vagina? deep inside?)
• The
nature of the pain (is it sharp? dull?)
•
Whether the pain starts and stops with penetration
• If
you've noticed any unusual vaginal discharge
Q: I told my physician that sex hurts and
she told me that I should just try to relax. Should I get a second opinion?
A:
Absolutely! Sex should not hurt. Discuss the pain with a gynecologist as soon
as possible, and if he or she can't help you, ask for a referral to a doctor
who specializes in sexual pain.
Q: I've been treated repeatedly for the
same vaginal infection, but sex still hurts. Could there be another reason for
my pain?
A:
Ask your gynaecologist to examine you more thoroughly to ensure that you're
being treated for the right problem. For instance, what may resemble a garden-variety
yeast infection could be trichomoniasis, non-infectious vaginitis, or even an
allergic reaction to yeast medications, a skin condition, or a reaction to your
birth control. If your gynecologist can't find the source of your pain—or
insists on the original diagnosis—make an appointment with a sexual pain
specialist.
Q: My vagina clenches up during
intercourse and it's really painful. What should I do?
A:
You may have vaginismus, a reflexive tightening of vaginal and pelvic floor
muscles. Vaginismus is thought to be the body's way of bracing itself against
sexual pain. Women who suffer vaginismus shouldn't force themselves to endure
intercourse; further anxiety, stress, and genital pain can cause the body to
intensify its protective response. Your gynecologist can investigate the
underlying cause of your muscle spasms and, if necessary, refer you to a sex
therapist.
Q: My vagina itches, burns, and hurts
constantly. What's going on?
A:
You may have vulvodynia, a widely unrecognized chronic pain condition that
affects an estimated six million American women. The cause of vulvodynia is
still a mystery, but what sufferers have in common is periodic or constant
burning, stinging, itching, and irritation of the vulva, clitoris, perineum,
pubic area, inner thighs, and/or the outer rim of the vagina (the vestibule).
Few gynecologists know about vulvodynia, so you may want to see a sex
therapist, pelvic floor specialist, or neurologist. For more information, go to
the National Vulvodynia Association's website, NVA.org.
Q: How do doctors diagnose and treat
vulvodynia?
A:
Before a doctor diagnoses you with this chronic pain condition, other causes
need to be ruled out—such as vaginal infections, dermatologic diseases, vaginal
atrophy, and fibromyalgia. Your gynecologist should ask a battery of questions
about your sexual health and history, examine different areas of your vagina,
and ask you to rate the pain with each touch. There's no FDA-approved
treatment, but your doctor may recommend one among a range of vulvodynia
solutions.
Q: It hurts deep in my abdomen when I
have intercourse. What could be the problem?
A: A
wide range of health conditions can cause deep abdominal pain during sex. It
could be a urinary tract infection, and other causes could destroy fertility if
they go unchecked (such as chlamydia, gonorrhea, pelvic inflammatory disease,
endometriosis). Deep abdominal pain requires immediate medical attention,
especially if accompanied by fever, nausea, and vomiting.
Q: How can birth control pills affect my
sex life?
A:
Birth control pills can reduce your capacity for lubrication and cause vaginal
atrophy, a thinning of the vaginal walls that can make sex painful. The
culprits are usually the newer formulations of oral contraceptives that contain
low doses of estrogen and testosterone-reducing progestin, which can also
decrease your libido.
Q: How can menopause affect my sex life?
A:
Dramatic hormonal changes can lead to a decline in sexual desire, an inability
to become aroused, and difficulty having orgasms. Menopause can also lead to
vaginal atrophy and dryness, which can both lead to pain.
Q: How can chemotherapy affect my sex
life?
A:
Chemotherapy—a type of treatment that uses drugs to destroy cancer cells—has
been associated with changes in menstrual cycle and in ovarian reserve (the
number of eggs in your ovaries), which can lead to temporary or permanent
menopause symptoms and negative body image. But some women may experience none
of those effects.
Q: Could my blood pressure medication
affect my ability to have an orgasm?
A:
Yes. It can cut the blood flow to your vagina. Talk to your gynecologist about
ways to maintain your ability to have an orgasm without sacrificing your
cardiovascular health. This may include reducing alcohol consumption, quitting
smoking, and getting regular exercise.
Q: I don't have orgasms anymore. What can
I do?
A:
Orgasms are a complicated mix of physical, emotional, and environmental
factors. With the help of your gynecologist or sex therapist, you should
examine what has changed about your emotional health, physical condition, and
relationship. Keep in mind that many women don't have orgasms without clitoral
stimulation. Don't be shy about experimenting with foreplay, oral sex, mutual
masturbation, and sex toys.
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